Saying Goodbye to Her Senior Apartment and Moving to a Long Term Care

Nov. 2021

Watching the recent Olympic games on TV brought back a lot of fond memories. I couldn't help but thought of my father who was an avid sports fan. My father loved basketball and he used to play on his interschool basketball team in HK. He loved watching sports of all kinds, often cheering loudly for his favourite teams, namely: the Toronto Maple Leaf hockey team and the Raptors basketball team. My parents used to live in a 4 bedroom house in the Toronto's east end. 

My mother was tirelessly in keeping the house clean and making it welcoming for her children and grandchildren. She enjoyed cooking for her grown children and grandkids. We were invited to my parents' house for dinner regularly, and mom always cooked up a storm preparing a feast for us as well as for the whole big fat family during special occasions such as Christmas and New Year. 

 After my father passed away in the same month as the first Olympic games were held in China in 2008, my mother lived by herself in the family house. She stayed in the house for a little while but that house became too big for her.  After selling her house and living with my brother for a short time, she moved into the St. Paul senior apartment. 

She had been living at St. Paul's Senior Apartment until she suffered a stroke which paralyzed the left side of her body. My mom and the family struggled with the decision where she should be after being released from the Rehab Centre. It was a difficult decision as we needed to consider many factors.

 After working with the social worker and the care team at Providence Rehab Centre, we finally decided that going to a long term care home would be the best for mom. Mom was fortunate enough to be accepted at a long term care home in Stouffville, though not our first choice.  Since Mom would be going to a long term care home, she needed to leave the senior apartment. To make the transition for her, we organized a small farewell party for mom so that she would have an opportunity to say good bye to her friends at St. Paul.

We made arrangement with a wheel chair transit company and brought Mom out of her nursing home. 

My brother called Mom's friends who all came to her apartment at around 3:00pm. Mom has been gone from her senior apartment since the stroke and this was the first time she was back at her old place.

 

Mom recognized her friends; they caught up with each other told each other the latest news about friends and church. I could see that Mom was emotional about leaving her old apartment. She was quiet, looking everywhere savouring the last moment at her own place. 

The transition from her senior apartment to the current nursing home must have overwhelming for Mom, as well as making decisions of what to keep and parting with her possessions accumulated over a life time. 

Mom's many friends' presence at the party helped lifted Mom's spirit. We chatted, took pictures.

We ordered a special cake and mom cut the cake and we served the food and drinks to her friends who stayed for a little while and said their good bye and best wishes to Mom. 

The small farewell party was a closure for Mom. She realized then that there was no going back to her old life at the senior apartment. 

She is moving on to a new chapter in her life at the long term care home.

One of the biggest fears of going into the home is that she would be left behind there and that no one would visit her. 

We have made a promise to Mom, no matter what the nursing home is, one of us will visit her each day so that she will always have visitors. We have made that promise to Mom and we will certainly keep that promise! 

 R.T. Toronto